I know that I haven't been writing much on this blog, aside from updating the moons and Celtic tree months. From your end, I'd understand if it looked like I'm not paying any attention to my spirituality at all, or at least only as much as I have been. But the truth is, I'm actually actively practicing my faith for the first time since I realized who and what I was, way back in 2001. And I can't fully express how happy it makes me.
First of all, I have two "soul sisters". We are the Three Queens of Cups. We have a Maiden, a Mother, and a Crone. I'm the middle one. It feels a little odd to be calling myself the Mother when I have no children, but it is simply my age -- the point at which I am in my life. I am almost halfway between the ages of the Maiden and the Crone in our little circle, which in and of itself is interesting. Out of respect for their privacy, I shall only refer to the others by Maiden and Crone.
On the last full moon, we held our first ritual. We were joined by Maiden's mother, and it was so exciting and empowering. It was the first time I had taken part in a circle (I'm not going to count the only other time, as it was more of a stage-show for a self-dedicated High Priestess type). We came together and celebrated and it was a new beginning -- the beginning of something good.
Last night, we three met to plan our next full moon ritual and our Yule celebration. Being the least experienced of the three, I am still learning and so can only contribute so much this far, but I am excited. I will be taking care of the cakes and ale for our next ritual (I called the quarters last time), and I'm looking for suitable recipes. For Yule, we are having a family gathering (no ritual -- just a get-together) and it will be just a small, intimate group of those closest to us. I feel so dofferent this December, as if I'm having new life breathed into me. I am so grateful for my soul sisters. I am grateful to have a safe place to celebrate and practice and just be myself. It is the greatest gift.
I will try to post here more often, and on a more personal level than I have been lately. Part of it is that I'm so used to "being in the broom closet" that I'm actually not used to talking about my spirituality. It's not fear, exactly -- more like just being out of practice. It doesn't occur to me to write about it because it's such a hidden (and sometimes almost forgotten) part of my daily life.
My husband is being so very supportive -- I honestly couldn't ask for a better response from him. When I first realized who and what I was , years ago, he was quite wary. But as time has gone by, and as he's seen that I really am the same person he married, but that I have just been able to define myself better, he has not only accepted it but has come to embrace it somewhat. He has picked up books for me that he thought I might find useful, and he has mentioned that he wanted to get me a Witches' Calendar but wasn't sure if it was the right one. While he doesn't ask questions, exactly, he is very open to what I want to explain. I am truly blessed.
So please don't take my silence as an indication that things are not going well. They are going very well indeed. (smile)
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